VIDEO CONFERENCE: Why do they always forget?
Anyone who lives with an adult with High Functioning Autism knows how aggravating it is that our “ASD” loved one cannot seem to remember anything we ask of them. From picking up groceries, to picking up the kids. From knowing our favorite restaurant, to remembering the name of the soccer coach. “Aspies” do not remember the small and large things that are important to us. And that makes us feel unloved and unappreciated.
This forgetfulness is often mistaken for ADHD, but stimulant medication doesn’t really help. Neither does our constant reminders. Our pleas for consideration go unheard. Eventually we fall silent and give up, or get angry and bitter. But there is another way to deal with this forgetfulness. It requires detachment — detachment from our desire that they are motivated to do things out of love and respect for us.
Shocking as it may seem, “Aspies” are not motivated to do anything that is not in their best interest. Most will readily admit this. They may love you and want the best for you, but it never occurs to them to think about you when you are not around. Thus — they do not remember what we ask of them.
The video conference is vital if you are going to save your mind from thoughtless “Aspie” behavior. Please come prepared for a private conversation with others who share this concern.
Make sure you have a private place to talk, without interruption. I will send you reminders of this Zoom conference, but if you don’t have your email set to receive the reminders, you may not notice. I would hate to have you miss the call, so make sure you’re able to get my messages.