VIDEO CONFERENCE: “Aspie” One-Way Empathy Isn’t Empathy
VIDEO CONFERENCE: “Aspie” One-Way Empathy Isn’t Empathy.
Hear me talking about this conference: https://youtu.be/HbmLdnqSmpY
Occasionally I am scolded by an “Aspie” telling me that they do indeed have empathy. They feel hurt and offended that I would suggest otherwise. Rarely an NT will tell me the same because they are aware of how sensitive their “Aspie” is. But sensitivity is not empathy, any more than words alone convey meaning, or paint on a canvas is a work of art.
Empathy is a two way street. If you have empathy you are aware of the heart and mind of the other, at the same time you are aware of your own heart and mind. You weigh the differences between the two of you, using your intuition in deciding when to speak, what to challenge, or when to be supportive. You are respectful of the other person because to be otherwise would break rapport. And without rapport, there is no relationship.
On the other hand our “Aspies” may have a kind of one-way empathy. They may know what is in their own heart and mind, but can’t fathom what is in ours. And they don’t ask. They may get their feelings hurt, become enraged over a misunderstanding, or try to persuade us to their point of view. But this is not true empathy. If it were, we wouldn’t feel bullied would we?
The purpose of this call is to clear up this misunderstanding and to find a language for speaking to those without empathy (what I call EmD-0) about the difference between One-Way Empathy and True Empathy.
Please make sure you have a quiet, uninterrupted space to call in.
Instructions on how to download Zoom can be found here:
Meeting link with a unique password for each video conference will be emailed 2 business days prior to the scheduled video conference. The email will be coming from Emily or Dr. Kathy. Please check your Meetup email settings to make sure you are able to receive emails. In addition, to prevent these emails from going into your spam, depending on what email domain you have, you will either need to add “@ASD-NTrelationships.com” to your safe senders list, your whitelist, or any spammed emails from this domain to “not spam.”
If you have done all this and you still did not receive the meeting instructions, please contact Emily at firstname.lastname@example.org by 6:30 pm Pacific time the day before your video conference.
All event times are posted in Pacific time.