TELECONFERENCE: How to explain “Asperger Syndrome” to others
An International Support Group facilitated by Dr. Marshack. This Teleconference is only for members of Meetup. Click here for membership details and to register for this call.
Topic: TELECONFERENCE: How to explain “Asperger Syndrome” to others
When: Thursday, September 16th, 1pm PT
“Aren’t all men like that?”
“It takes two to make a problem and two to resolve it.”
“No one’s perfect.”
“Look for the silver lining.”
“I would never allow someone to talk to me like that!”
“If it’s that terrible why don’t you leave?”
These are only a few of the comments we receive from our family and friends when we try to explain our plight with our ASD loved ones. After being shut down several times, many of us don’t even try anymore, for fear that we’ll be blamed for complaining yet again. In fact, we might even believe we are at fault for the failure in the relationship, so we suffer alone in silence.
The New York Times published a while ago an article on “Who Blames the Victim?” I think this article sheds some light on why it is so difficult to explain ASD and our “Asperger” loved ones. First, of course, autism is complex so coming to terms with our “Aspie’s” Mind Blindness, Context Blindness, and lack of Empathy, has taken a lot of work on our part, let alone helping others understand the theories.
Second, it is a stretch to consider ourselves victims. No one likes that. However, this group is about just that. Recognize that you are being victimized and that it is time to take back your life. It matters not that your “Aspie” doesn’t intend to harm you. Simon Baron-Cohen considers the “Aspie” as having Zero Degrees of Empathy. Zero means that you are left holding the bag over and over again, with no sympathy from your “Aspie,” or those who blame the victim.
Third, a bulk of the population tends to blame the victim for breaking the rules of loyalty, obedience, and purity. A minority understands that to truly understand the victim, you need to care about an individual and consider fairness. Truly enlightened people understand that you can be harmed by an Aspie who doesn’t intend to harm you. And they want to help. They will listen to our complex story.
When you join this teleconference, please choose a quiet place, without interruption, so that you can feel free to participate. Thank you.
If you have technical questions about using MeetUp, check our Guide to MeetUp here: https://asd-ntrelationships.com/guide-to-meetup/
We have over 10 years of questions from members answered in here.